Escape from Perfection
In a perfect world, I would have had a November musing sent out by now. Does it even count as a November Musing when it is posted on November 30th? Anyway, I have chosen to give myself an early Christmas gift this year - letting go of perfection! So, this will be my November and December musing for this year! I am late for one, but early for the other. Now onto the topic on my mind…
Do you ever feel like you are in a tug of war and you are the rope? There are days when that is a very good description of how I feel. No matter what I am working on, there is something else being neglected. The interesting thing is that I am not alone in that feeling. Many people I talk with are experiencing life in a similar manner.
More organized personalities keep their head above water pretty well. They diligently get out their planners following their carefully orchestrated plans. My hats off to them! Well done. I am just not one of them, not by nature. My planner is pretty messy looking. I had to choose one with lots of unlined space to jot things down that could accommodate all of the things I try to squeeze into the allotted space. I write things down so I don’t forget them. Too many things have fallen through the cracks of my life.
My introspective mind has been hard at work trying to discover what is driving this sense, at least for me. It seems I have an incredible ability to focus on whatever is in front of me to the detriment of everything else! I still cringe at the memory of my dear little daughter waiting in the school office for her mother to pick her up and take her to the dentist. Only mom was at home dealing with the overflowing commode and completely forgot about the dentist. A guilt trip ensued and I still beat myself up over it, although time has made the stick a bit softer.
Anyway, back to the tug of war…I think that in working so hard to be aware of everything I need to remember, a new kind of stress has presented itself. I can’t forget anything, let anyone down. Perfectionism has reared it ugly head. I spend too much time looking at all of the lovely social media posts showing perfectly orchestrated events in the photos. When I really think about it, I mean really, how many of you post pictures and stories of your less than perfect moments in life? I have to work at remembering that each post took time to set up, each video was probably edited a number of times and not everything in a photograph is as it seems.
So, in a way I have written myself to the the cause for me - perfectionism and a helpful solution. After all, perfectionism is the slave driver it is cracked up to be! My solution is grace, learning to give myself some grace. According to an online dictionary, grace can be defined as “courteous goodwill.” I am extending “courteous goodwill” to myself by sidestepping the pressure of a self imposed deadline that does not have much value. More growing in a growth filled year.
You all have helped me grow so much this year by taking time to read my musings, giving me encouraging feedback, coming to take my classes, looking over my sewing projects at my one attempted craft show. All new beginnings that stretched me far outside my comfort zones. In the coming year, I will continue to push myself and pace myself so that I don’t stop growing, or wear myself out with the effort. I hope to see more of you in this adventure I call Middle Rose Life. Look for more classes, hopefully some of them as sewing projects in the not too distant future.
One last note, the photo above shows the projects I made to have for my Holiday Open House that never happened…this year…the good news is they will wait for next year. It is okay to wait.
Merry Christmas to each of you as you learn with me how to live free from perfectionism!